bf: come over
me: dont u have a period?
bf: we’re gay
me: oh yeah
I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”
I had a dream last night that Jesus finally resurrected and when white people found out he wasn’t white they arrested him for 2000 something years of tax evasion
the 1700s called……they want their clothing back. haha just kidding the first telephone was invented in 1876
a good post AND i learned something. thanks tumbrl
I don’t know if anyone remembers this picture from right after Tangled Ever After came out of Rapunzel and Flynn’s beauuuuuuuutiful rings:
Welllllllll, I got married about six weeks ago and here are our rings!
Yes, that’s right, we found a jeweler willing to make the Tangled rings for us.